Destiny Takes You Strange Places
by Danibellas Of Rohan
Summary: Well, Legolas falls in love with this one gothic elf chick named Nikaiya when he meets her in the Garden of Eden. Hope You like and please review!


Disclaimer: ~*I don't own Lord of the Rings, and I don't own Legolas, though I wish I did. Therefore, don't sue me.*~  
Chapter 1: The Argument  
  
"Son, it's time you took the responsibility of being a grown elf," Thranduil yelled at his immortal yet young looking son Legolas. It had been a long 50 years since Legolas had been on a date, and Thranduil thought that he should get in the habit again so it would be easier to find his future bride. " But Daddy, I like being a girl! I like my braids and my hair stinks pretty like flowers!" "Son, you were born with male organs and we just don't do plastic surgery and sex changes in Middle Earth!" " But Arwen got her chin taken away, why can't I.." Legolas began, but the disturbed King could not deal with his nonsense anymore. " That's not the point! You are getting old enough where you need to start shopping around for a wife!" " Well, maybe that would help my fangirl issues a tad, but still! I haven't found anyone right for me yet. Why are you rushing me?" " Well my boy, when I was your age, I was forced to get married to your mother, and I guess it would just be better if you had an arranged marriage." " But why Daddykins? Why would it be better for an arranged marriage?" " Well, no reason, I was just jealous of the opportunities you have ahead of you, so I was hoping you would take my selfishness for wisdom. But Damn it! It didn't work!" " Ok Dad, just to make you happy, I'll shop for some chicks. But I'm not guaranteeing anything." " I knew you would soon come to your super elf senses! I'm so happy for me!. I mean, You!" " Oh I see what's going on.. You're trying to hook me up with some dumb broad so you can go into early retirement! You're so hurtful!"  
  
So Legolas stomps off swing his long, silvery hair like Jan Brady. He needed to cool down, so he went to take a relaxing stroll into the depths of Mirkwood. Little did he know what he was about to come across... *THUD* " Owwy!"  
  
Legolas grabbed his head in agony, and looked down to see what had mysteriously fallen onto his head and bruised his delicate scull. It was a big brass skeleton key. It was so rusted over that Legolas could hardly tell what it was mad of. "This key must be older than my father and surely not made by the elves," Legolas thought out loud. He looked up again to see if he could tell where the mysterious UFO had come from, and right in front of him staring him in the face was a red arrow pointing straight towards the very heart of the wood. It certainly hadn't been there before, so at first he wondered if it had just been a figment of his imagination, or if he had " strayed into a dream," as Aragorn son of Arathorn thought when he met Arwen, but really it was the date rape drug finally coming into effect. Arwen's plan had succeeded. But back to our story. Legolas blinked and rubbed his eyes a few times just to make sure it was real. Oh yeah. It was real. There came another * Thud * and this time, Legolas was hit even harder by another UFO. This time it was a large stone with a piece of parchment wrapped neatly around it and tied with a piece of string. He unwrapped the parchment and began to read. ~ Go on, Follow it. ~ it read. " Hey, who's doing that?" Legolas yelled rather loudly. Nobody answered the call, as he suspected would happen, so he looked around once more to find out for certain that nobody was watching or stalking him. He thought for once that it might have been on of those pesky fangirls, but he saw nothing and walked on. He followed the arrow into the depths of the forest. He knew it would be a long walk, but decided that he needed to find out what was going on. He was a brave little archer. " Holy monkeys! I forgot my bow and quiver!" Legolas yelled. " Thanks a lot for not telling me before I started walking this far, narrator!" Hey, so not my fault buddy! How am I supposed to know you were going on a quest like this? I'm just telling the story as it goes, so back off! Really, you're smart enough, can't you just make new ones? " Hey good idea! Why didn't I think of it sooner?" Oh no thanks, I don't need to credit for my brilliance. Go ahead. Take it. I know my genius ideas are a great help to your reputation. " What is Genius?" Look it up shit for brains. But anyways, I guess I'll keep going with the story as soon as " genius" over there figures out how to concoct a bow and some arrows. Got anything done there, elf boy? " Still thinking. You can't rush these things you know. " Well, I guess since this moron can't get anything done, I'll have to help him out a bit, you know, spoon feed it to him, and you can just wait for the next part of the story in Chapter 2! ~* PeAcE OuT! MuCh LoVe! AnD.. I'm SpEnT!  
  
Author's Note: Well, Danibellas hopes you liked the chapter. If you review this, they're be much more to come. You may not have thought it was funny, but I did, and it was hard for me, so BACK OFF! Ok sorry, I got a little carried away there, but anyways please review! Normal Normal Default Paragraph Font Default Paragraph Font Strong Strong Middle2C:\WINDOWS\TEMP\AutoRecovery save of Document1.asd Middle2C:\WINDOWS\TEMP\AutoRecovery save of Document1.asd Middle=\\NRMS\VOL2\USER\STUSAVE\destiny takes you strange places.docÿ? Times New Roman Times New Roman Symbol Symbol Comic Sans MS Comic Sans MS ZDisclaimer: ~*I don ZDisclaimer: ~*I don't own Lord of the Rings, and I don't own Legolas, though I wish I did Middle Middle Middle Middle Disclaimer: ~*I don't own Lord of the Rings, and I don't own Legolas, though I wish I did Middle Normal Middle Microsoft Word 8.0 Disclaimer: ~*I don't own Lord of the Rings, and I don't own Legolas, though I wish I did _PID_GUID {291BF186-3F36-11D7-9086-C71FD1C38560} {291BF186-3F36-11D7-9086-C71FD1C38560} Root Entry 1Table 1Table WordDocument WordDocument SummaryInformation SummaryInformation DocumentSummaryInformation DocumentSummaryInformation CompObj CompObj ObjectPool ObjectPool Microsoft Word Document MSWordDoc Word.Document.8 


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